Being disabled in time of trauma

Being disabled is never a picnic, but sometimes it can be really frustrating and downright scary.

People who know me can generally understand me. Throw in some trauma and people who don't know me and...well...lot's of luck.

Ten years ago when I had back surgery, I was recovering I the hospital. I needed help with something. I hit the call button and said "I need help. " All I got back was "We can't understand you sir." With cerebral palsy, the harder you try to talk, the worse it gets. Involuntary motions.

Help never came. When Jodie came in, she was furious.

Marriage is about pooling strengths. Throw in disabilities, like CP, as in the case of Glenda and Darrell, and Jodie and I, marriage goes beyond convenience. We depend on each other. We use our abilities to overcome the other's disabilities...if that makes any sense.

A few patients and accompanying companions followed the nurse into the secured treatment area. The nurse indicated that Darrell would have to go back to the waiting room because there wasn’t room for two wheelchairs.

Darrell explained that I needed him for speech purposes. But, once he relayed how the injury occurred and other necessary medical details, he was told to leave. The nurse assured him that she would come get him if he was needed. None of the other companions were forced to leave.

Do It Myself Blog – Glenda Watson Hyatt » The Foot as a Brake: Do Not Attempt This at Home

Healing and peace my blog buddy Glenda!

Concatenate

I had never seen the word "concatenate" until today.

I was trying to merge multiple columns into one in Excel, in an effort to squeeze a two page phone list onto one.  Microsoft help screens are terrible; I always have to go to Google for real help.

I was trying to see if I could have different text formats within a concatenated cell.  Don't try to figure this one out...I am always trying to figure out the impossible.

Today, on my Don Quixote-like quest, I hit a computer virus...a bad one.  The computer ran a scan, then took me to a place to pay.  I knew that was not right.

I put my technical smarts to work.  Geek prayer - "Please God", geek trick- turn computer off...turn computer back on.

Didn't work.

I called the help desk.  Karen, our computer tech, came over.  I told her I was Googling to figure out  how to concatenate.  She laughed and said "that just sounds wrong!".

She had to re-mirror my computer.  It took quite awhile.

Sigh...

Rockwood Child Welfare support staff...R.I.P.

Me and the hot babes of Rockwood Child Welfare.

We are now combined with East Multnomah, but we will never forget the sizzle we were...

Beaverton School District - support for the disabled

This story struck me on a few levels:

Beaverton School District's reaction to developmentally disabled student's efforts show why bureaucrats get a bad rap | OregonLive.com

I went to Holladay Center in Portland thru the third grade. Holladay was a special school for the physically disabled. My dad's job took us to southern California for a year. I went to a special school down there as well.

When we returned to Oregon in 1974, I started going to regular public school in Beaverton. My mainstreaming experience was very positive. Jodie went to Holladay center as well. She was mainstreamed in Portland. He experience was not so good...another story.

One thing I did struggle with was socialization. I had friends in my classes and all, but I missed some of the comradery I had with other kids that had struggles similar to mine. At Holladay Center, there really was no disability, we all had different abilities.

What moves me about this story is Conall's persistence to create a club for special needs kids, and Beaverton school district administrators working to help Conall reach his goal, while abiding by privacy rules.

Takes me back to spring of 1982. I was a senior about to graduate from Beaverton High. A vice principal called me out of class. The school district wanted to pay my way to go to a summer science program at the University of Iowa.

I remember thinking "Why would they do this for me? After graduation and all."

I went for the two week program. I was exposed to many scientific fields of study. I made lots of friends. I remember a guy with cerebral palsy who worked for Caterpillar, with a message that has stuck with me to this day - whatever you do, be the best at it...make it worth the company's money to accommodate your needs. I remember our weekend trip to Chicago, and a trip to the top of Sears Tower.

I am still moved that the Beaverton School district made that life changing opportunity available to me. I am moved now to see they are still willing to go outside the box to provide unique opportunities for kids in their charge today.

A cable and a ring...greater accessibility

Our friend, Shel,  from work came by tonight.  He had heard that Jodie had to park her power chair at the bottom of the ramp in the garage, then user the railing that Shel installed a few weeks ago to walk back up the ramp to close the door.

Shel attached a light cable to the top of the door, ran the cable across the ceiling, and put a ring at the end of the cable so it hangs just beyond the railing.  Now, Jodie can come down the ramp, pull the ring, and the door closes.  Very slick!

As We Pray for Peace…

I can't quite get my mind around the shooting down in Tucson.

Gabby was not on my radar before, but everything I hear about her I like. A centrist working for solutions; my kind of people.

The people who died, the judge, the 9/11 baby, the others...I am just sick.

Words from one of my favorite blogs help me.

Remembering our baptism.

Remembering why we are here.

Thinking and praying about as if life depends on it, because it does.

But what I do want to suggest is that we all need to change our own war like mantras that we put out there when we want to accomplish a goal.

This week we concentrate on our baptism, our initial moment of starting fresh as Christians and our constant reminders of those promises from that day forward. How can we renew these promises with a sense of urgency with regards to peace? How does God wish us to greet one another and deal with our differences? How can we be the refreshing waters of Baptism for others and a healing balm for the world?

This week let’s think about that and pray for those who were in harm’s way this week.

And most of all, let us pray for those who died and for peace.

As We Pray for Peace…We Need to Change « Googling God

Much love to Denise this day

Denise is having surgery today to remove cancer affected areas of her body.  We are clinging to the hope the doctors give us, and the love of God that carries us.

We thank you for the prayers you have prayed for Denise, and we ask you today to say a special prayer.

Denise and Ken, Jodie's sister and brother-in-law.  Denise is a protective older sister; Ken was like a surrogate father/friends to Jodie.

Ken walked Jodie down the aisle to me when she became my bride in September 1990.  Ken was 6'7", former University of Portland basketball star.  Tall guy with a huge heart and a kid-like love for life.   He was diagnosed with a brain tumor two weeks after our wedding.  He was told he had a year to live.  For the next four years he taught his family and friends what it meant to really love and live.

Vance was born in 1992.  Ken had a basketball in his hands by the time he was two.  To this day, Vance is most comfortable when he has a basketball, or a baseball, in his hands.

Fast forward 20 years.  Denise was found to have rectal cancer.  It is a serious cancer that requires aggressive treatment.  I cannot go into great detail because of a complicated life situation.

Cancer is never fair.  It is not fair that Denise lost a husband, and Vance a dad, to cancer.   It is not fair that Denise now has to fight cancer.   I am not going to defend God for letting this happen...or causing this to happen.  I have read the Book of Job...I know the futility of that.

God is with Denise and the family.  The pop can fundraising has been successful.  The donations continue to come into the "Denise Downey cancer fund"  at U.S. bank.   And, just last week, a family at church provided a house for Denise, Vance and Jodie's mom to stay in for awhile.

Today is a big day for Denise.  A wide gamut of emotions, but she is very strong.

Please say a special prayer for Denise and her son, Vance, today.

Thank you!

Can we send an ambulance for you sir?

"No!" I replied.

Women are stubborn, and men, well, we're men!

I have not been feeling well this week.  I've been tired and I have been feeling faint at times.  No coughing, no sneezing, no headache...just feeling yuck.  I have not fell sick enough to stay home.

This morning when I got to work, a coworker said she could hear me wheezing.  My chest felt heavy.  I texted Jodie to call our doctor to find out what to do.  Of course, they hear "heavy chest" and they want to send an ambulance.  I had my coworker, Sheri, take me to emergency.  Jodie had to come by bus because of her power chair; a coworker rode with her.

I can't  thank Sheri enough...so kind!

They did a bunch of test, a cat scan, and a chest x-ray.  Everything negative...maybe a spell of indigestion. I avoid going to the doctor because they rarely figure out my problem.

I was told not to drive until I followup with my doctor tomorrow.

Nephew Vance and our son, Eric,  picked Jodie and I up at the hospital.  Eric drove our bus from Vance's house to our home.  How many young drivers get to drive 3 qtr ton vans?  He did a wonderful job.

I am thankful I am ok, hopeful the doctor can figure out what this is.

Life...

A word from Jodie...

I can now get my chair in the house. It does pretty well. So far the only place I can't get to in the chair is the master bath. But, other than that, it will go in all of the other rooms, though some are a tight fit. I think I am going to feel better having the chair in the house. Eric was able to secure our portable ramp down on the door from the house to the garage. I am worried though about Troy walking up and down the ramp. I am hoping we can put some kind of handle by the ramp for Troy. 


Laundry was a breeze!   My arms did not go numb and my back didn't spasm. I think I am going to be able to do a lot more from the chair. It has gotten so I cannot do much from the standing position anymore.

Jodie's wheels, like new!

Jodie has had her power chair for a year now.  When it has been working properly, it has made her life much easier.  When it has stalled continuously and has to be reset over and over...and when she has not been able to reset it herself...well...you know.

The last straw was a couple weeks ago when Jodie stalled out in the rain a couple blocks from work.  I had left early to drive Eric to school for open gym baseball practice.  As I blogged a couple weeks ago we took the power chair into the shop.  They had to order parts.  We kept Jodie's chair at work, since her workspace is all set up for her power chair.  We got a manual chair in the meantime to get Jodie to and from work.

The shop called yesterday to let us know the part for her power chair had come in.  Eric and I took it in this morning, and returned to get the chair at noon.

They replaced both the left and right motors. They updated something...I don't remember what they said.

Eric drove the power chair to our van and he could not believe how smooth it drove...and twice as fast!

Jodie has not tried it yet, but I am anxious to see how she does.  I can see her booking down the sidewalk, getting to work in half the time.

I know it sounds strange, but I kind of look forward to the day when I have my own power chair to book around in...using less energy for my disability so that I have more energy for my abilities.

;)

Messing with a big kid...

I took Eric to the doctor the other.  He had what looked like an infected sliver that would not go away.

His regular doctor was not in, so he had a lady doctor attend him.  She was tall and she seemed surprised to see a kid that matched her height.

She diagnosed it as a wart.

There are two ways to get rid of wart - the slow, no pain, medicine way, and the short, painful, freezing off way.

Dry ice, wart falling of - it was a n brainer to Eric.

The doctor came back with a cup of smoking dry ice.  She had a smile on her face and a "I get to mess with a big kid!" look in her eye.

She dabbed Eric's wart with a swab of dry ice.  It was painful...I could tell.  Eric grimaced.  The doctor said that little kids scream and push her away when she does that to them.

When she was done, she threw the dry ice at the wall...it was gone in a puff of smoke.

Her smile and spirit reminded me of my Aunt Barb who was a great nurse.  Hi cousins Tiana and Travis...nice to have contact with you again.  Your mom is smiling down on us.

To whom does the power chair belong?

Yesterday, Jodie and I took her power chair in to Providence home care services to be looked at.  She stalled out a couple blocks from work yesterday, and she has been stalling out a lot lately.

I unloaded Jodie from the van, we went into the "store front".  The gal behind the counter was very nice.  She called for a tech.  He came out.  Jodie transferred to a regular (non-wheel) seat in the waiting area.

The same tech came back out awhile later.  They had the power chair up on the rack.  From viewing the log from the onboard computer chip he could see that Jodie's chair had indeed been stalling out...a lot!  The diagnosis was that the left motor on the chair needs to be replaced.

It will take five to eight business days to get the part.  They offered Jodie a loaner chair, but with her experience with the loaner earlier this year, we figured dealing with Jodie's chair is a better option.  I will take her to work and to her meetings for now...no busing it or long way ventures for Jodie for awhile.

Another tech brought Jodie's power chair out.  The gal behind the counter was on break.

The look on the tech's face was priceless! Like - "OMG! They are both disabled!  Whose chair is this?"  A deer in the headlights look - totally!

He came towards me with the power chair.  I do look like the more disabled one...no doubt.

Jodie said, "Umm, it's my chair."

"Dang!" - I could see it in the tech's eyes.

Jodie and I had a good laugh...

Bye Shadow

As I wrote before, we are a household of five dogs.

Make that four.

Shadow, one of Ma2's "Boys", was put down earlier today.

Shadow was a big, old, Lhaso Apso with attitude.  A grumpy old man whose growl frightened Vinny, a lab mix four times Shadow's size.

As a pup, Shadow had a near death experience.  A nylon stocking in his intestine was the culprit.

Shadow was a cudly dog, Ma2 says.  Jodie called him "Teddy Bear".   Shadow loved to play, he loved to tip over the small trash can we have by the computer table.  We have a plastic container--our bill box--Shadow would take whatever paper he could get out of there and eat it.  He even tried to eat the lid!

Jodie called Shadow the "Matriarch"  ("patriarch" woman!) because he carried himself in such a kingly manner around all the other dogs in the house.

My favorite memory of Shadow is how he would sit at my feet while I sit at the kitchen table.  He would get as close as he could to my feet and lay down.  I could never resist reaching down to pet the Big Guy.

Yesterday the vet said that diabetes was getting the best of Shadow.  Eleven years old.  Pain.  No guarantee that extreme measures would even help him.

Ma2 brought him home last night so we could say goodbye.  I got choked up this morning as I pet Shadow and said my goodbye.

Shadow is curled up in a much better place now.

Bye Shadow.

Skeeter, Shadow, and me

Thanks!

It's too easy to focus on the empty half of the glass.  It takes an extra muscle in the heart to see that in everything there is something to be thankful for.

Eric has been to my office, seen the cube where I spend my days...has no desire to see it again.  He calls my job "the most boring job in the world!"   Policy, data, paperwork...he really is not that far off!  Yet, I have been doing the job for over a decade.  I am proficient at it.  And...I am employed!

I am thankful for that.

Jodie...Woman #1.  She works her tail off as an office manager with little thanks or appreciation.  This has been her first year in a wheelchair full time.  As long as the wheelchair is functioning right for her, this transition has been a big blessing for her as it has reduced pain and strain on her body.  Twenty years of marriage!

I am thankful for that.

My son.  Eric is 15 and towers over me now.  Great student.  Awesome pitcher who helped lead his team to state.    He has given two sermons at church this year.  Jodie and I have always known that Eric was a gift from God to bless this world.  Every day that is more apparent.

I am thankful for that.

Family.  A job for stepdad John after a twenty month search.  Jobs and college for my nieces and nephew. Everyone rallying around  SisD with her battle with the Big C...the boys picked up a giant 80 bags of cans donation to support her yesterday.   I had an awesome visit with my sister last month, and I have been seeing my mom and have been having great visits on Saturday mornings while Papa John teaches Eric to drive.  Life - good stuff and hard stuff mixed together.

I am thankful for that.

Women #1 thru #99...you guys know who you are...keeping me sane or insane.  Lunch dates, words of wisdom...keeping me together.

I am thankful for that.

My church family - Resurrection Lutheran.  Interim Pastor Craig an Pastor Karl.  Faithfully sharing with us words we need to here.  Sisters and brothers at church with words of encouragement.  News that Pastor Mike has accepted the call to come lead us.

I am thankful for that.

Happy Thanksgiving!

This is YOUR problem

Yesterday I got an email to problem solve a medical eligibility issue for one of our kiddos.

I use to do that kind of problem solving in my previous duties; not so much now.

I went to a coworker.  I kindly told her, "This is YOUR problem to deal with", as I showed her the e-mail outlining the problem.

She shot back, not missing a beat, "That name at the top of that page is YOUR name," pointing to the e-mail.  "This is YOUR problem to deal with!"

One of us was schooled.

;)

SisD update

I had a request for a SisD update.

She had a good day today. She spent a week in the hospital.

Sores inside her because of an allergic reaction to treatment made her unable to hold food down. She was sent home yesterday continuing to have that problem. She needs another week of treatment before period of rest and then surgery.

 It's hard to share stuff when the silver lining is not apparent. The treatments seem to be working. God's strength is carrying SisD and the family through this.

 Your continued prayers are coveted and appreciated.

Yes Virginia, the season is upon us...

Twelve thirty five.  I was savoring my leftover enchiladas.  My phone rang.  Not a number I was familiar with, but I answered it.

It was a mom wanting to get her three children on the list to get toys from the "Toys for Tot's" program.  Someone told her she had to go through DHS to get them on the list.  Our office is the closest DHS office to where she lives.

I am the point person for Toys for Tot's in our branch.  I basically pester the caseworkers by email to find out who will be responsible for getting the toys delivered to the kids after the toys are delivered to the branch.

Our office is a Child Welfare branch.  The toys we get are for foster kids or for kids in families with whom we have involvement.  This lady did not fit that criteria, but she did have a foodstamp case.  We can't help her at our branch, but I didn't tell her that.  I took her information.

I emailed the lady's information to the person who is coordinating Toys for Tots for the district.  We're not sure this family meets the criteria that has been set up for the program, but we are finding a way to make it work.

The desperation in the lady's voice kinda got to me.  Her kids, foster kids, all kids in need.  I know that Christmas is about way more than gifts under the tree.  To kids, though, Christmas is about gifts under the tree.  Gifts under the tree shows that somebody cares for them.

It does take a village to raise our kids.  Kids in need are all of our kids.

This holiday season, amid the hectic pace, amid the joy and celebration, amid the hopes, dreams and possible disappointments, find a way, ever be it so humble, to reach out to the village and help make a miracle happen.  

;)

Sprinter discrimination!

AAA 

Attn: Membership Records

600 SW Market  St.

Portland, OR  97201        

We have a 2006 Sprinter van.   My wife and I purchased it in June 2007 as a mobility van.   My wife has a power chair and I have a scooter.

A couple weeks ago we called for a tow and learned that you cannot tow Sprinters in Oregon.

Please cancel our membership #:  

  Thank you,

Troy Wittren

SisD and the Big C

Jodie's sister, Denise, has cancer.  Rectal cancer.

I hate calling it the "Big C".  It seems to give cancer a respect that it does not deserve, when in fact it is a hideous, scary disease.

It has been barely a month since she found out that the sickness that she felt was not just food poisoning.  Her whole life has changed.

Chemo, radiation...and upcoming surgery.

Denise is a hairdresser at Salon Ambiance in Gresham.  Hairdressers are a tough breed.  On their feet all day. Talking with people all day.  Counselors who cut and do hair.

The chemo treatment has made it to where Denise cannot work at the moment.   The ladies at Salon Ambiance, along with family and friends, are rallying to help Denise get through this tough time.

There is a bottle and can drive to raise funds to help Denise get through this tough time.  Bring your bottles and cans:

Saturday, Nov. 6  10am-2pm
Salon Ambiance
 192 NE 2nd
Gresham, OR
MAP

You can also donate money at any US Bank branch under "Denise Downey Cancer Fund"

Denise's husband, Ken, walked Jodie down the aisle to me at our wedding 20 years ago.    He was a giant of a man.  Not just his 6'7" basketball stature, but two weeks after our wedding we learned that Ken had a brain tumor.  He fought it with grace for over four years.  Their son, Vance, was two when his dad passed in December 1994.

Vance is now 18.  Tough deal, real tough deal.

Doctors are optimistic that this battle will be won...but the battle is real and it must be fought.

Donate cans, bottles, or money if you feel you can.

Even more important though, I ask you to pray for Denise:

-release from pain
-remission from cancer
-financial needs met
-a place to stay that does not have stairs
-strength and grace for Denise and her son Vance

Thank you!

Johnnie is "too disabled" to fly

Too disabled to fly...totally bizarre!

US Airway employees wheeled inspirational speaker Johnnie Tuittel onto the plane and seat belted him into place. An agent then returned and wheeled him off the plane. He was told he was a danger to himself and others, that he would need a companion with him if he wanted to fly.

www.wzzm13.com : Grand Rapids : UPDATE: Grand Rapids man with cerebal palsy removed from US Airways flight

Johnnie is a professional motivational speaker. His website is extensive and impressive. He has even authored an acclaimed series of children adventure books, the Gun Lake Adventure series.

I have not flown since I was a kid. I was always treated well by the airlines. Even though I'm ambulatory (able to walk) I remember being wheeled from gate to gate by airline employees. I remember being wheeled onto a plane at least once. I remember boarding early, and I think I was first to get off. The staff on the plane was always very responsive to my needs. Jodie says she experienced the same when she use to fly.

Married 20 years and we have never flown anywhere together...I know...we are not that exciting.

The disturbing part of how Johnnie was handled is how the airline was able to perceive Johnnie as being "too disabled" and were able to act on that perception. Johnnie has flown an half million miles with no trouble.

I can't relate to Johnnie's recent experience on the plane, but I do know what it is like to be in and out of my comfort zone.   Most places I go to anymore are places I have been to before.  People know me, or at least have seen me before.

Occasionally I find myself in a situation around people who don't know who I am or what I'm about.  I get the looks - "why is he driving that bus...he can't hardly sign the receipt!"  And, many people assume that since I have cerebral palsy that I must also have a mental disability as well.

We all judge each other...it is human nature.  Usually these judgement are in the form of a stare, or a comment.

To get kicked off a plane because of these kind of judgments...

I hope Johnnie's career soars with all this publicity...and I hope the airline has a wonderful opportunity to learn an important lesson.

;)